The Last Battle: My Fear

The day we reach an agreement to cut off employees was not a difficult day for me, as I always knew there would be a day like that coming; I was prepared. In the evening when I was talking with Xin, he said he feared not being able to reach the goal when planned during the day, which I fear not. What I fear was returning to the old pattern again, the patten that make the boss keep trying to find funding for us without actually focusing on how to achieve our established goals. I was afraid that he keeps borrowing money to pay off previous debts, while we struggle to reach our goals. I was worried that the boss prioritize fund raising over proving our values.

Yesterday¬†came a challenge: the local government finally seemed to approve one of our projects: letting us operating a part of one restaurant building inside our community, which means we can again get loans from banks with relatively low interest rate. The boss hesitated. According to Xin, the boss wondered if it’s still necessary to lay off people.

Now it looks like the boss has overcome his reluctancy. He finally sent out an email telling everyone about our plan. What remains to be seen, though, is how the restaurant operates in the future and whether it could bring us profit. And even if it does, does it help us?

The boss has one thing I could learn from: he sure knows how to connect with people and never gives up unless he reaches his goals. As for the many things that I contempt about, there’re many.

He never listens to anyone. He is so dedicated to his own thoughts that nobody seems to be able to change his mind. Talking with him is of no use; he likes reading from elsewhere. Yesterday I was irritated by him when he shared something he read about and it was about things we already mentioned to him earlier for several times. A man who trust his eyes more than his ears, I’d say.

He is over-confident about almost everything. He always overcommit. I don’t know a single occasion when he reach his goals or fulfilled his commitments.

He has many things I couldn’t bear with, but what the heck I’m doing with him?

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